A Crash Course in Prague
Northern Bohemia
What a spectacular trip.
So nice, I’ll say it twice.
What a spectacular trip.
I awoke early Friday morning to drag my butt down to a metro stop, about 15 minutes away, to wait for the bus. The instructions read “wait for the bus between the metro station and the church. So that’s where we waited. What they really meant was “wait for the bus on the opposite side of the church, away from the metro station. Minor in the scheme of things, but still an annoyance. I figured that they were going to cheap it out and send us on a school bus... You know like one of the big yellow ones; well instead we were sent on a Mercedes Benz motor coach. A bus that seats 53 comfortably had 24 aboard. Everyone had their own row.
On the way out of town we hit a fair amount of traffic. Nothing too bad, but traffic none the less. It was strange that as soon as we exited city limits it seemed as though we were entering another country.
Even the cars are different. A fairly large number of trucks and construction vehicles on the highway seemed like they were relics from the cold war... and there’s a good chance that they were. Another funny thing about the cars here, a popular brand of car (like Ford or Nissan in the US) is “Skoda.”
Translated Skoda means “pity.” As in, “what a pity.”
Something else strange was the Zakim Bridge.
Well not exactly, and we passed it too quick for me to get a picture, but we went over a bridge that looked exactly like the structure of the Zakim, only scaled down a bit.
No big digs here.
The countryside is amazing. Breathtaking almost. Expansive fields and rolling hills dominate the landscape. This is all framed by mountains behind them, looming in the hazy distance. This scene was enhanced by the “topol” trees, standing some 30 meters high, yet skinny like pencils. Topol translates into Poplar. Yet these are not like the poplar trees I have seen in the US. These trees seem to have secrets. They have seen so much standing alone in the middle of the fields, in diligent single-file rows. They tower above all the crops, namely corn, and of all things sunflowers now brown with their heads drooping, ready to be turned into the ground. Growing along the edge of many of these fields were Apple trees, full of fruit, ripe for the harvest.
The countryside is quite the majestic scene.
We eventually left the flat-lands behind and began to drive up into the mountains. The trees became much thicker, and turned predominately coniferous. The streets narrowed, and became increasingly windy. I’m talking curves that are in excess of 270 degrees... plus a 10 or 15 degree slope.
These roads make Massachusetts roads, even western Massachusetts roads, look like flat, perfectly paved, runways suitable for aircraft use.
I actually buckled my seatbelt to prevent myself from being thrown across the cabin. And on one of these obscure windy roads we arrived at a glass factory for a tour.
And again I am left in awe of this process. Photos are posted on the photos page of this entire trip, including some of this facility where they melt the sand mixture overnight at some 4000 degrees and then begin work with the molten glass at 5am. They finish their work around 9 or 10, so when we arrived at 1pm, it’s all a show for the tourists. They were making a number of different kind of glasses, all at once. Working in teams of 5 or 6, they all served different functions to accomplish the task at hand as quickly and elegantly as possible.
Notice the lack of the word “safely” within that sentence.
I say this because everyone who was working there was in sandals, shorts, with no eye protection, gloves, or any other safety device.
Did I mention that this glass is upwards of 4000 degrees?
Oh. And they are drinking beer while working. Czech beer... which is 12% alcohol by volume.
OSHA would have a field day. This is all in addition to the moving track that transports the finished glass at 1000 degrees to the cooling oven (kind of an oxymoron), that swings the glass on their blow pipes around the room at quite the speed.
And they are drinking beer.
This is not to say that the glass is not amazing. I purchased 6 snifters (they come as a set) for use at home. When in Bohemia, buy crystal. I got the set for 700 crowns... about 40 bucks. And they are stunning.
After the glass factory we headed to Jested, a mountain that stands some 1016 meters above Bohemia. The picture at the top if me on the top of the mountain. We rode a cable car to the top... which was only moderately disconcerting. I can’t help but look for a safety certificate every time I get into an elevator, or some device, like a cable car, and feel slightly nervous when I don’t find such a certification... But I made it, so it can’t be too bad. At the top of Jested stands a tower that has won awards in architecture. It is shaped like an upside down funnel, and contains a restaurant, hotel, and viewing platform.
I couldn’t help myself, and had to call my father to bust him because I was on top of a mountain while he was sitting in a meeting...
For those of you who aren’t hikers, you may not know that at the top of every mountain (or at least nearly every mountain) in the states is a datum. It’s a marker placed by the USGS (United States Geological Survey) to signify the official top of the mountain. When you reach the peak, it’s a tradition to touch the datum, thus confirming you actually made it. Since I’m in the Czech Republic there is no USGS... or CRGS... so I was unsure if there would be a marker. But to my surprise there is a brass button set into a rock on the northwestern side of the mountain. I have found my datum, and it’s picture is on the photos page.
One other note about Jested. In front of the tower at the top is a Crucifix, overlooking the town of Liberec. Needless to say it is incredibly symbolic, and I photographed the scene as best I could... Those pictures will come later this week, as they were taken on film only and need to be processed.
From Jested it was onward to the hotel. I was impressed with the bus driver’s ability to navigate the narrow streets with trams, other busses, and pedestrians. We arrived at the Hotel Praha translated, it means Hotel Prague... and we were in Liberec... go figure, It’s like a Hotel NYC in Boston...
My roommate for the evening was Arthur, who goes by Artie, is also from Massachusetts. It’s nice to be with my kind.
That is to say they pronounce “scallop” correctly...
The folks from Juarisova all ended up at the same dinner table at the restaurant “Potrefrwa Husa” which translates to something like “half dead goose.”
And it was the best, completely dead, food I’ve had here to far.
As always the wine was lacking, but it’s not going to kill me. Dinner was the “Pork XXL” which consisted of a seasoned pork steak the size of a 18oz T-bone, served with half a loaf of bread (a light rye of sorts), that had been sliced part way thru, and in between the slices were strips of smoked bacon.
These Czech’s really have this pork thing down pat.
It was SO good I ate past full. And then ordered dessert... Chocolate cake and a warm snifter of Remy Martin Cognac VSOP to wash it down.
Pure Bliss.
After dinner me and the 6 girls from Juarisova decided to attempt to find a place to party. Note the use of the word “attempt.” We headed down the street toward a place called Babylon AD. The map we were using lacked half the street names, and was not very clear, thus my orienteering skills came to use. I managed to get us there, and back...
The seven of us walked in to the complex and the first thing you see is a fake strip club. The girls are on the table... wearing clothes. People are dancing and drinking. Pretty typical club I suppose.
We walked by.
Laser tag was closed. A couple of the girls found every ridiculous animal figure and had me take a picture with them on it. This included the full size camel, monkey, and lion. There was also a monster truck, scaled down, Marilyn Monroe, and a statue of a Mexican in a sombrero. I’ll recover the pictures from them and post them later...
We left there in search of a less trashy place and discovered that the club they had suggested was closed. We passed a bar that was playing music, but there was only 40+ year old drunk Czech’s dancing in overalls with no shirts. Not quite the scene for the 20 something crowd... who speak no functional Czech.
At this point we broke up. Three of the girls went back to the hotel bar while Becky, Justine, and myself decided to try and find some place to sit down and have a drink. Becky convinced Justine and I to go into this bar that was down a spiral staircase. We obliged. The walls were papered with sheet music, and instruments were hung from the ceiling along with other musical paraphernalia. The girls ordered something mixed... while I went with the safer choice... Jack Daniel’s on ice.
It translates to “Jack Daniel’s.” Thank God for that.
At this point we watched some drunk Czech kids sing karaoke with the jute box. As a sound technician I was cringing at the incessant feedback because they didn’t understand that they need to step away from the speaker with the microphone. It was a pretty interesting time. It included Justine asking how old one of them was. He replied sixteen, and showed 16 fingers in two motions, after pausing to think of the English word for his age. He jokingly said something back to her in Czech, with a smile, that we interpreted to be, “you need to learn some Czech.”
He’s not wrong...
After that experience we headed back to the hotel, a couple of blocks away. I hit the hay shortly after catching the end of “Bad Boys 2” dubbed in Czech, and about 4 minutes of CNN international... It’s just as worthless over here.
I woke around 8:30 this morning and took a shower, before heading down to have breakfast. The table was me, and 18 girls. I love my life. Just to make it better the Czech’s have cookies for breakfast... and smoked bacon.
These Czech’s really have this pork thing down pat.
After breakfast we had the chance to go into the town hall tower, of which I have a some really nice shots of the town from above. There is also a picture of the group of us (only 6 of us went up) looking down from the square. I’ll have to recover most of the pictures from other people, and have mine developed to showcase the true magnificence of the view. More to come later.
The bus left at noon for a castle. The tour was lame... but then again I was the tour guide reading a poorly translated English version of the tour. They actually used the word “impregnated” over “impenetrable.”
Thus this castle was never Impregnated. Thank God.
The most surreal experience came on the way home. We had stopped at a gas station to grab some snacks and stretch our legs, so I seized the opportunity to go take pictures of the field across the road. Aside from the fact I was crossing a road where the speed limit is 100 KmPH I ran into two men sitting on the edge of the field drinking. I snapped my pictures, and turned to leave when they started talking to me. Obviously I don’t speak Czech. I responded, in Czech by saying “sorry” followed by, “I don’t understand Czech.” One of the men responded, “Anglicky?” Translated it means, “English?” I responded, in Czech, “Ano”, meaning yes. They motioned to the field and began talking in POLISH. I said, “this is beautiful” motioning to the field. They repeated “beautiful” in English this time. The motioned to their beer, offering me to sit with them and look over the beautiful Bohemian field and drink with them. I responded by saying, “My Autobus” which means “my bus,” pointing and starting to walk away. They said some sort of thing like “Polish” as I was walking away.
Thus I was having a conversation with two drunk polish men in a field in Bohemia using Czech, English, and Polish to communicate.
Go figure.
I need to learn this Czech thing.
And there you have it. My trip to Northern Bohemia. I can’t help but think my freshman English teacher (in college) would have loved this. He always talked about “My Antonia” by Willa Cather and how she (Antonia) came from Bohemia.
More photos to come later. For now there’s just the digital ones up. I’m sure the film ones came out better.
...2 Poles, an American, and a Bohemian field. Who could have put that one together....